The Lotus Citadel
Travelling south from Spyre to Khalad-Khuzir, before the great Khuzir range of mountains one comes across the river Tai'shur. The river originating from the eternal snow covered peaks flows away from the dwarven lands and into the lands of the Lotus Citadel. From distance one can only notice large fields of plantations and the stone towers of the citadel. Easily mistaken for a fortified agricultural community by those who know not the citadel, one gets to realise when coming closer that this is not so. Travelling on the main road to the Chromatic Gate, the main gate of the citadel, the traveller will walk between large plantations of what seems like large black flowers. The citadel itself is an old fortified town, hosting many libraries, museums, laboratories and one of the most renowned arcane academies of Somnium. An ancient town it is, as many of its buildings are deteriorating and the ruling executives of the citadel have sent an emissary to the neighbouring dwarves to help them restore the crumbling buildings of the citadel.
If one chooses to become a citizen of the Citadel one soon learns the secrets of the existance of the citadel itself. Founded forgotten times ago by a powerful planeswalker tired of war and endless conflict in her own plane, the citadel has worked since then to preserve what the people of the planeswalker's original world had all but destroyed, peace and the land.
The planeswalker had brought with her a single outwordly artifact. It was a seed of a flower which could be used to draw mana from rather then the land itself. She and a few other volunteers took care of the flower until it reached maturity and using magical means they grew more plants out of that single seed. And until now Lotus Citadel, so named after that flower, takes care of the vast Lotus fields and continues the planeswalker's dream.
The Citadel attempts to hold a balancing position in the world of Somnium, thus it has not forged any firm or permanent alliances with any nation or faction. However it knows that without the backing of the Spyre its efforts as a diplomatic merchant nation would be extremely hard, so it holds an understanding of co-operation with the City State. Thus many Spyrenians travel to the citadel to benefit from its intellectual resources and many citadel Legates reside within Spyre attempting to get at first hand the most recent news and happenings in the world of Somnium.
Even though anyone may visit the citadel, only pure humans are allowed to become members. This is because the citadel upholds the view that only humans are capable of balancing the 5 separate colors of mana. And upon the colors of mana is the community of the citadel organised. As there are 5 colors there are 5 factions within the citadel itself. These factions operate independantly but never against each other as all who reside in the citadel that the colors can not exist without each other.
Those who use green mana as a base to their arcane powers are called Gardeners. They are mostly honored as responsible for the culitvation of the Lotus fields and the extraction of the petals of the flower. But this is not their only role as many Gardeners are adventurers, travelling the world of Somnium and beyond to learn of other plants, animals and ecosystems.
Those who use red mana are called the Legates. The Legates are the merchants of the citadel. It is with their refined skills of trade, barter and conviction that the citadel gets its much needed income of gold and required artifacts. Sometimes thought as too foolhardy and forgetful of the peaceful cause of the citadel, the Legates never the less are as devout to the cause as all the other factions. The main tarde commodity of sale are Lotus products. From petals to roots all is sold but the seeds which are kept for further growth and not to create competition in the monopolous industry. The Legaets make sure though that the lotus is accesible to all as it is their creed to see to it that all can benefit from the magic of the lotus and forsake the destructive methods of drawing mana from the land. However not all Legates are merchants as the citadel commisions some as spies and agents to report on the goings of important events and people of Somnium.
Those who use black mana to channel their energies are called the Witnesses. They and only they are responsible to take care of the guilds of the citadel. Trained both in physical and mental skills the Witnesses train the initiates of the citadel in the basics of the way of the Black Lotus. Their methods are harsh and difficult to cope with and thus many initiates fail to become members. But those few that manage to pass always look upon the Witnesses as their mentors whichever place they may be in the citadel system. The Witnesses are also sent to recruit potential members from the many cities and towns of Somnium. Myth and fear surrounds them as many claim that they are also trained assassins and many untimely deaths have been accredited to them. This opinion is indeed true but never openly discussed among citadel members.
The users of blue mana are called the Emmisars. The Emmisars are the true diplomats of the citadel and those who meddle with the politics of Somnium. Wether in the Citadel or in the cities of Somnium, the Emmisars are always discussing the latest happenings and drawing strategies of responses. As the Legates are shrewd merchants and masters of trickery among the common folk of Somnium, the Emmisars are themselves skilled within the aristocracy and ruling class. Friendly disputes break between Emmisars and Legates many times on grounds of philosophy and methods of approach to other beings, but these never escalate beyond an amusing level of Emmisars claiming that Legates are only rough and uneducated in etiquette copies of themselves, and the Legates giving the Emmisars a long list of imporvised and otherwise adjectives of poshness. However the Emmisars are not only political philosophers but many times are hired wise men and women who act as advisors to the leaders of the many realms of Somnium.
Finally come the ones who uphold the virtues of white mana. The Knights of the Petal, as is known their Order, is dedicated in guarding the lotus fields and the citadel itself from barbarian incursions and attempts to take over the much wanted vales. Although it is a defensive force itself skilled members of the Order are sometimes hired to fight the wars of others. The Order is also the local police force of the Citadel, seeing to it that its rules are abided by those that inhabit the town. Many times in the past the Knights of the Petal were ordered to fight alongside armies great and small, always attempting to hold the balance true. In the citadel itself they are aided by great golems and enchanted beings called Lotus Guardians. Constructs of the combined power and abilites of all the factions of the Citadel, these semi-sentient beings are formidable warriors.
The ruling council of the citadel comprises of 5 members. Each is by no means higher then the other. They are elected each decade by the members in a democratic ballot to uphold the Way of the Lotus.
Lately the council has assigned a young Legate to travel to Khalad-Khuzir to seal a deal with the local dwarves in both the reconstruction of some of the buildings and also in the possibility of purchase of some of the new metal discovered in their mines, in the hope of creating a new set of even more powerful and resistant Lotus Guardians and experimenting with other uses of the rare metal. The young Legate called Myrofir was accepted in the ranks of the citadel only 5 years ago yet has shown an innate ability of trade and thus has gained the respect of the council, thus they have assigned him this difficult and tricky task. He hopes to live up to those expectations and prove that the Way of the Lotus is truly the best way of life.
( I need members, especially 5 council members..if anyone wants to become one, please add your character to this string. ONLY human characters please. )
em.. so what did i do wrong and i am not getting responses?
dont worry, once we have the primer out and officially open the new mill for RPing, the more attention will be attracted, and more characters will pop up.
first thing you did wrong was give people too much to read in too large a block. By spacing paragraphs out you make it easier to read, and you dont scare people away. Furthermore, you may have provided too much unnecessary information right away; This is purely the beginning of your guild, so you dont need to cover everything right away.
There is nothing technically wrong with your writing. The guild is a quality guild with no obvious flaws. However, becuase of the length of the article people probably skim through, like i did the first two times i tried to read it. And as such cannot find the part of the essay that details what exactly a Guildmembers advantages, and motivations are.
Lastly... One other thing you have to consider.. is that there isnt a hell of a lot of people just yet in this new mill.. and many of them already have a guild, and are apart of some ideas which may develope into stories. If you wanna gain some people then do what i did, and advertise. Post in other peoples threads, talking about how your guild relates to theirs, since that is an important topic. Then you can build perhaps a storyline with that guild that you will eventually write into a proper story, and through that more people will see your guild and perhaps become interested in joining.
You arent done just yet.. this whole thing is just starting. Keep posting, and make sure your posts are relevant, and to the point.
thanks for the advices
since this was my first attempt at something like this i predicted problems.
but i could not forsee them
if it doesnt work ill join something else
and i hope people will be tolerant with my newbiness