Community -- Poll: Who is the real badass comedy duo Beyond Dominia (a priceless compilation)

Beyond Dominia: The Type One Magic Mill: Archived threads of the Beyond Dominia Type I Mill: Community -- Poll: Who is the real badass comedy duo Beyond Dominia (a priceless compilation)

By Rakso, Patriarch & Rules Ayatollah (Rakso) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 02:11 am:

Choice #1: Lord Azmodan


Hello My Friend,
I am AZMODAN and I am 26 years old. Ever since I was 10 years old, i have
always loved and have been extremely dedicated to Magic: the Gathering. I
spent my first 2 years learning ALL the rules of M:tG...I then spent the
next 4 years working up new strategies and deck combo's...When I turned 16,
I started entering Regional Tournaments and placed first every time. People
sed I should enter in the M:tG National World Championships, known as the
DCI, and i very well did. Over the past 10 years, I have organized and
played over 138 different decks. I can honestly and truthfully tell u that
I have won the DCI Nation World Championship 7 times, and placed 3rd 2
times and 4th 1 time.

I am happy to be back with the Beyond Dominia Community...I currently
circulate through 68 different M:tG Websites and can spend only a limited
time with each community. I love meeting and making new M:tG friends so
please feel free to Email or IM me to chat. I am here to help anybody with
any questions concerning decks, rules, strats, types, themes, and anything
else that may cross ur mind. I will be with Beyond Dominia from:

April 24, 2000
May 24, 2000

I will be checking my post to see if anyone has a question or comment
periodically. Once again...I can help u with anything and I tend to better
ur knowledge w/ Magic and hold life long friendships. Thanks for taking the
time to read this and hope u take advantage of my help!

Lord Azmodan

Choice #2: Ihsan and Immo


----- Original Message -----
From: "Alex Shvartsman"
To: "Oscar Tan"
Sent: Sunday, September 10, 2000 3:17 AM
Subject: Re: Relevant problem threads on Beyond Dominia

> See my post. I compared him to Mike Flores. That oughta hurt :)


By Master of the Hunt & Ihsan on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 12:32 am:
(COMMUNITY -- Over here, people, this is fun! Apparently, Ihsan/Master of the Hunt - yeah, the guy is still using the same IP address and is sore because it was proven - still does not understand what 1984 means.

1984 has nothing to do with police states.

Remember, history is mutable in the hands of Rakso, and when Rakso's beliefs in God are blasphemed so by such an unworthy cur, 1984 it is!)

A few minutes ago, I spoke to Ihsan. (I was actually speaking to myself in the mirror, but you probably guessed that.)

We've decided to make an official announcement. Consider this a press conference of sorts....(I'm holding back tears and so is Ihsan)...I can't continue..Alright..I'm composed now. (I am leaving right after this to visit my drama coach, to prepare for my speech at the next Oscar's.)

We came to this mill with the intention of, well, attempting to lead the Mill flock out of Magic bondage and into the promised land. (Unfortunately, we mistook Charmander for the Burning Bush and Pikachu for Moses. Sorry about that.)

We,....we..(tears again)..we tried to eradicate the ignorance of the Magic community. And.. I'm afraid we've failed. (Actually, we've decided to scale down our expectations. Instead of trying to enlighten the entire Mill flock all at once, we will instead begin by spamming Alex Shvartsman in an attempt to convert him to our beliefs by the time the Invitational comes around.)

Indeed, we had a mission. (Martin Luther King, we're not.)

We noticed the ignorance and silliness, and we felt a paternalistic urge to guide the little people. (But we kinda ran afoul of the Patriarch. Big mistake.)

We presented what we thought were basic deck representations of Zoo and Necro. (Actually, they were Exodus's basic deck representations, but we really don't have to go into that right now.)

Instead of posting our actual decks, we decided to combine our knowledge and tone the decks down a bit to accomodate the slower learners here(all of you) so as to present basic ideas. (We're actually the alter egos of Michael Long and didn't want to disclose tech before the Invitational. Then we realized we weren't invited.)

Well it didn't work. (And we had a ten-hour discussion in bed over this last night before coming to this conclusion.)

But, there was humor, too. (Unfortunately, it didn't come from us, but who's complaining?)

Ihsan and myself both thought it was funny how Brian Weissman is credited with inventing "card advantage", and how Mike Long is credited with inventing a necro deck. (They didn't really invent it, just popularized certain notions about it, just like we are now credited with "jackassness" even though we didn't invent it.)

Well, that is like saying that Al Gore invented the Internet. (We firmly believe that Dan Quayle did.)

Gee..what a novel idea by Weissman(and Azhrei)...."I think I'll put all the restricted cards into one deck, and then throw in some powerful legends cards!! I'll be famous!!! (Actually, this wasn't what Weissman really did, but I don't have a clue what he was really thinking, so I'll just give my closest guess without being too obvious about it.)

No one will realize that my deck is actually the restricted list!" (Heh, heh. I got this idea from Mike Pustilink.)

Indeed, what an original idea the Deck was. We should just call it Restriction.dec, and the same goes for the keeper decks on this Mill. (Again, why Keeper and The Deck were different is over my head, so I'm trying to conceal that fact without much success. There are no Keeper, Necro, Zoo or Trix decks... I mean, Necro-Donate decks... where I play, remember?)

There is nothing wrong with restricted cards. We love them too. (There's nothing wrong with multiple personality disorder, too.)

Just use them in some interesting decks for crying OUT LOUD!! (I want to be funny, recalling what ORRGG said about a 20% win ratio.)

Truly imaginative. As for "Longpotence"(built by a notorious cheater who is not worth two broken walnuts), that is not worth my time, but oh well.. (and considering I'm not worth even one.)

"Hmmm..let me put Necro in a deck with handkill...I'll be famous too!!" (It sure took me a long time to figure this out... Long played Necro for two Invitationals but never asked me for advice so I never knew.)

But I am moving away from my main point, although we find your rear end kissing of pros such as Alex to be quite amusing. (Which is why I shall spam store owners like Mikephoen after I'm done with Alex... but first, I have to get Alex to behave like a Pro so I become more famous when I convert him.)

If only you would all realize that Magic Pros are not quite as skilled as you think they are. (Some are actually better than me, so that should give you an idea.)

All they are..well..all they are is people who have devoted their life to a rather simple card game which we all love(it is a great game). (I, on the other hand, have devoted BOTH my lives to deciphering this simple card game.)

But these are not exactly guys with the skill level of professional athletes or musicians. (They're just funny people who hang around the Internet and get together with the boys on weekends, unlike me, who hangs around the aether and gets together with myself.)

There are many people who could be Magic pros if they wanted to be. The pros are just the ones with the time to play. (It just takes too much of my time leading sheep and spewing out bull excrement.)

And that is the problem. All of you want to be pros. You are so insecure that you either worship the Pros, or aspire to be one, so all of your ideas can be lauded as if you were the next Albert Einstein or Copernicus. (Not knowing the Mills, this is again another vague generalization on my part. I do not know enough people like Azhrei who live to tell off the Pros on the Meridian Magic list.)

But the truly disturbing thing was the quality of your decks. (Could you have made those primers shorter? I'm only in the second grade, for crying out loud, and the longest word I know is "J-A-C-K-A-S-S". Hell, I can't even spell "Azhrei", "Rakso", and "Shvartsman" properly, much less "nEwOnDa!!".)

Oh, but we want to avoid insulting your..oh forget that guys ARE just flat out bad!! Like I said, this is an easy game, but show a little bit of skill, please??!!. (You have to, because I sure am not.)

Examples of deckbuilding folly: (Translation: Stuff I never did understand because I was too busy proving that Elrond is actually Jon Finkel using an assumed name. And ORRGG isn't from Belgium, he's from Japan and I know 'cuz I heard the accent speaking to my dreams as he called me a retard.)

-the inbred notion that certain ancient decks are the best decks, along with the neanderthal belief that balance or timetwister will always be drawn to save the day at the last possible moment. (Naturally, this is a grave logical fallacy. I've never seen a Timetwister before, so it must be bad.)

-copying the decks that pros build. I noticed that many of you were guilty of copying invitational decks, even though many pros barely even play type I anymore, and all of the pros are not as good as you think they are. (Definitely. I have never stooped to adding a Demonic Tutor to my MBC Merc deck. First, I say that adding 12 discard spells to a Necrodeck is obvious and common sense. Then, in my wisdom, I say that anyone who does this is copying a Pro's deck.)

Learn to think for yourselves, you will be better for it. How do you think we got so good? (You really want to know? My Mom used my Dad's old condom with the puncture by a syringe in the tip to cover my milk bottle.)

-underestimating the importance of early game disruption by comforting yourselves with the belief that you will somehow magically overcome heavy disruption without careful deckbuilding. (And especially when playing Stompy or Sligh, mere illusions by the Pros inferior to my all-wall deck.)

-failing to carefully analyze the matchups and the actual percentages in type I matches between prominent decks due to personal agendas. (In other words, failing to recognize the fact that I have never played against a Necro, Zoo, Trix or Keeper deck in my life and had to take Michael Long's word on the matchups.)

Other non-deckbuilding flaws of the Mill children (Note that I am specifically trying not to piss off Rakso here.):

1. You are all so easily baited!!! (You all love unloading sarcastic comments to make everyone laugh because you think Rakso is not going to notice.)

Ihsan and myself noticed that right away and moved in with remarks like the one about attending a great school. (And we really do... it's called the School of Life Kindergarten.)

We couldn't care less about that, there are more important things in life. (Well, neither do you, but you're just in this thread for the humor.)

But we knew how immature you were, and how easily a remark like that could get you going. Man, did it work!!! The Mill was buzzing as news of our glorious arrival spread like a brushfire!!! (Well, maybe the thought of everyone virtually rolling over in the aisles was more appropriate, but we got you to notice.)

We do think we are superior to you, but that is only natural, because we are. (Again, we were never genetically enhanced inside a test tube. We were simply products of the technique called "defective condom."

But we also knew that a lot of the other remarks would get to you, (although most of them are true), some were just designed to take advantage of your infantile level of mental development. (And we're glad you stooped to our level. The Mill's never been this fun, ever!)

2. You run this mill like a police state!! No dissenting opinions...don't upset the apple cart!!! Yep, pure totalitarianism. (AND NO ALL CAPS, TO BOOT!)

The elders don't want to lose the only power they have in their small, small lives, so they attempt to crush all opposition to their political agenda. (Although they have no way to do this... I apparently never read the FAQ which contained, "Q: How do you become cool like Rakso?")

This time it failed, as our mission clearly led some of the party cadres to question their, as Rakso put it "1984" type existence. (Although I think I'm beginning to get what this 1984 biz is about, but I'll actually have to read George Orwell first. Maybe after I master Dr. Seuss.)

Fortunately, we are above such a regime, and although we are leaving this sewer, we freely encourage open revolt against the elder's iron-fisted rule. (We noticed we pissed off Rakso, not to mention Shadow. Besides, Rakso gave Le_Lepreux my IP address, and I just got a hundred death threats.)

Ihsan and myself also enjoyed the double talkers, mainly the Mill "elders". They stress tolerance and patience until they are challenged in any way. (I have a constitutional right to be a dumbass, never mind that the Philippine constitution has very specific points against this.)

Well at that point, all their rhetoric is out the window. Time to censor!!! (I resent my junk being neatly archived in one thread when it was my intention to spam the Mill with garbage.)

No tolerance and no patience!! (After all the effort I put into making my garbage completely incomprehensible, all Alex gave me was a short comment comparing me to Mike Flores! And I don't even know who Flores is!)

The elders of this mill, I must admit, surprised us. Instead of realizing that they were dealing with a higher, divine power, they shunned our guidance. (It might have something to do with who's really the almighty around here.)

Well, the good grace of our divine light does not shine on all, I suppose. (I just watched Blade and figured I look nothing like Wesley Snipes.)

We feel bad for you guys, especially the oligarchy(Azhrei, Rakso, Orgg and a few others), but we still hold out hope for others like Commander S. Without us, will you ever be led out of ignorance? (I'm still seeing how far his BS tolerance will go.)

Probably not. Will you ever wise up? (Ignorance is bliss.)

Probably not. I feel bad for you people. Ihsan feels bad for you. He wanted to make sure that our sadness was conveyed in this message. (I had my dog edit it this time, out of consideration.)

But soon we won't be sad. Soon we will leave our state of melancholy, and we will laugh. And laugh some more. And laugh until it hurts. We know fools when we see them, and wow, did we see them!! (Again, remember that I am talking to myself in the mirror as I type.)

Well, in conclusion: We feel that we are missionaries that had come to enlighten you noble savages(some of you not so noble), and that all of you were worthy of redemption(or so we thought). (Then we remembered the reaction of the Qing Dynasty emperor to the Western barbarians, offering cheap dishes to the inventors of porcelain.)

Well, you chose to continue to practice your ancient religion, and deny our true path to grace. (Next, we'll try to spam a predominantly Islam site based in Iraq. These mainly Christian Mill regulars are too forgiving.)

We are sorry about that, but we realize that you were not worthy to begin with, and it was our mistake to even have thought that. (Maybe we should have enlightened you on Pokemon first, so that you will eventually move on to Magic.)

We do apologize for that, but not much else. (Boy, do we!)

Well, maybe ignorance is bliss, but I doubt it. (Ihsan in the mirror says self-love is true bliss. Excuse me but I have to go to the bathroom now.)

Long live Zoo and Discard!! (And may we know what they are really all about!)

Best wishes(not really, but it seems like a nice
thing to write),

Ihsan and Master of the Hunt, Divine Agents of
Enlightenment (not to mention complete lunatics who worship Yawgmoth the Ineffable over at

By mikephoen (Mikephoen) on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 12:50 am:
Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

By Alphastorm, the Aspiring Tactician (Alphastorm) on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 01:04 am:
We don't need your lameass deck ideas. You both suck and I won't be missing you. Glad to see you leave.

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 01:22 am:
Should the door hit you on the way out, try not to let the knob get lodged.

At least they had the intelligible one write it.

By Exodus, the Original, Authentic and Honest-to-Goodness Non-Imper Lord of Randoms (Exodus) on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 01:27 am:
Listening to you two makes me wish I were dead.

Oops, I forgot. It's you I wish were dead, not me.

By Naxan on Sunday, September 10, 2000 - 01:30 am:
The only thing worse than a guy with a big ego is an IDIOT with a big ego...

...or should I say one idiot with 2 big egos...

Choice #3: Legend and Negator (the original were two separate people)


By Legend on Tuesday, February 27, 2001 - 12:17 am:
We resign from the tournament and BDominia as of now.

Additionaly, all of my own communications and interactions with BDominia, and computer Magic in general, are terminated as of now. All contact is to be severed forever.

Here are our official statements for the reading pleasure of the unwashed multitude, the unclean masses...the Magic proletariat.


"I can speak for Negator on the resignation issue, but I will leave to him whether or not he ever chooses to come back for a savage raid or two. I can say with certainty, however, that I will not even be returning for such indulgences. But his resignation at this point is very real, and comes after the symbolic playing of the first match of the T1TOC2. It is symbolic and meaningful because it is the only match that should be considered of any value. Perhaps the T1TOC2 should be cancelled out of respect for this void that is being left. I question whether it can continue with the obviously crippling fact of our departures. As for me, I have chosen to vanish into obscurity, to disappear into the vastness of eternity. My continuing existence as an omniscient entity will continue within the serenity of my own existence, free from the troubles of the masses."


"My identity has been imitated and my superior ideas attacked without justification. This community is not ready to comprehend my greatness, and will continue to remain shrouded in the darkness of ignorance. I'm surrounded by idiots."

Conclusion: The sudden and concerted revolt by the natives of BDominia had been long anticipated, and this day had to come. The concepts of deckbuilding can be argued to no end, but I grow tired of it. What was once a fun little diversion, an experiment in bringing the teachings of the Legend down from on high, has more than run its course. Fittingly, this will be the only opportunity that will ever be offered to grasp the teachings of the Legend. Do what you will with what I have left you, although it is unclear whether this small portion of such a vast body of knowledge will be sufficient to sustain the dim masses from the rapdily approaching dark times. As I have mentioned, the revolt against the ideas that were imposed upon BDominia was expected and prepared for accordingly, it was only a matter of when the experiment in bringing the teachings to the masses had to end. The time to end it has arrived.

Alas, I must now vanish into eternity.

By Meridian (Meridian) on Tuesday, February 27, 2001 - 12:49 am:
WTF... did they really write this?

By Meridian (Meridian) on Tuesday, February 27, 2001 - 12:51 am:
He sounds just like Ihsan?

Choice#4: Negator and Urza216


By Urza216 - saviour of all dominia on Thursday, February 15, 2001 - 04:02 pm:
What Rakso said is true but what Gzeiiger said is not true. I have never traded online in my life. I have had experiences with people taking hundreds of rares from me. HUNDREDS! I don't trust people with my magic cards and I would never trade with someone I don't even know online. Please don't delete this post I just want poeple to know I would never steal other people's cards online. Also I have never heard of

note: not all the messages that I pretended to be stone cold wantabe aren't deleted. There is still one in the type 1 lounge titled: just want you to know.
By urza216 -saviour of all Dominia on Thursday, February 15, 2001 - 04:36 pm:
Actually it's titled: "off Subject" Like you to know.
By Negator on Monday, February 26, 2001 - 08:45 pm:
Urza216? Hey, are you the guy with the black deck I used to hang out with in the old store?
By JP 'Polluted' Meyer, the Archivist (Jpmeyer) on Monday, February 26, 2001 - 09:50 pm:
I doubt he'll respond. He was thrown out of here, and most likely Phyrexia as well.

Choice #5: Azhrei and EDT


By Rakso on Sunday, May 28, 2000 - 04:07 am:
I have a few questions I would like answered, if you would please.

> the monoblue deck is quite simply better than the old fashioned "The
> Deck." The reasons monoblue is better: 1) you can play thawing
> (nearly as powerful as library of alexandria),

Are Glaciers really that useful in a deck that is nearly half mana
producers in the first place and should be drawing multiple cards per
turn anyway? Especially since Glaciers are a very slow card and some
T1 combo decks are very, very fast. What about Necro? Does Glaciers
equalize with decks designed around lots of manipulation and card
drawing? Many decks run 4 Wasteland plus Strip Mine as well.

2) brainstorm & impulse are
> your best library manipulation now that all the tutors are
restricted, so
> there's no point going off color for the single tutors

Aren't these cards all fairly limited in what they do? They each
touch the top few cards in your library and you need to play multiple
copies of each. Would you use four of each for maximum abuse, or a
combination? How would you be able to deal with a fast Zoo deck or
some of the extremely fast Sligh decks that can be made in T1? Powder
Keg is clearly not an adequate answer due to creatues with varying
mana costs as well as the lack of a "get me this card NOW" Tutor.

3) creatures are
> good. Yes, creatures are good in type 1. It used to be that in
type 1,
> anti-creature spells were boss: moat, abyss, swords to plowshares.
> the post-tempest creatures are really powerful, from jackal pup to
> morphling, creatures are good because they have been powered up
while the
> anti-creature spells have not. This gives you less reason to go
for black
> for abyss, white for moat or swords to plowshares, as you would
> just play another morphling most of the time in that slot.

But is creatures are THAT good, doesn't it make sense to play anti-
creature measures? Certainly a second turn Moat is a good way to deal
with Jackal Pups, Negators, and various other nasties. Abyss as well
handles many problem critters as well as the ones that don't attack
to hurt you, such as Gorilla Shaman, Dwarven Miner, etc.. Granted,
Morphling is a powerhouse, but would a mono blue deck really want to
run more than one or two? I would assume that one or two should not
be THAT hard to handle in many cases.

Also, now that
> the Mirror Universe kill sucks it helps to have a greater creature
> density.

My only regret about 6th edition....

> If you read Zvi's report you'll notice he went into the invitational
> trying to run a standard multicolored control deck, but it lost to
> everything. Chapin helped him build a monoblue deck in Kaula
> which Zvi then went undefeated with.

Didn't Zvi use Mox Diamond over Mox Ruby in that deck? No offense to
a great deckbuilder who has made some fantastic Extended decks, but
his Classic deck was pretty weak. He admitted himself to not liking
the format very much at all in the first place and eventually going
with a Classic version of an Extended deck that he knew well.

> I remember reading some posts criticizing the type 1 invitational

In all honesty, you really have to admit that half of them being Trix
decks showed a pathetic amount of innovation, especially compared to
some of the more unique decks like the one that abused Bazaar and

> You take one of the fossils still playing "The Deck" against a
field like
> the decks in the Duelist Invitational and unless your name is Brian
> Weissman you'll probably lose every game.

I agree with you here completely, IF you mean the original version of
The Deck. As you must be aware, The Deck has changed quite a bit
since then, and I think that if you are claiming that an up to date
version based on the same principles would probably lose every game
then I think you are mistaken. I don't see why you would say that
though, as a version like Brian Weissman currently plays should do
well in the current Classic field. What are your feelings on Keeper?

Those invitational decks are
> tight.

And, if you will forgive me for saying so, they are also Extended
decks that cost more for the most part. They're tight, but not very
versatile at all. I also thought that the Trix combo was too easily
disrupted in Classic with both FoW and Misdirection being available,
not to mention the dicard that Necro was packing.

Which do you think is better: Extended Trix (with Mana Vault and Dark
Ritual, obviously) due to the unrestriction of all Tutors, or Classic
Trix with the Moxen and Ancestral, but fewer search options?

If you add in a few weenie decks then you'll have a good guantlet
> to test your current type 1 deck against.

My current Classic deck as you may have guessed is a Keeper style
variant that I have been evolving for a few years now. While I admit
that there are a few cards in there that I would change at a major
tournament where I was expecting heavy combo, it has held up very
well against Extended Trix (75%), Sligh (80%) (what I would call
higher end versions of Sligh, but ones that could be improved
nonetheless), mono-blue with Glaciers (50%)(this WAS my hardest
matchup, to be sure-- I don't know how much of this was skill over
deck, to be fair), Necro with and without Negator (67% and 50%,
respectively), and Zoo (90%). With the exception of the Trix deck,
these were all Classic decks with a full complement of power cards,
or very nearly so. All else aside, while I am not playing 'pros'
regularly, I know them to all be intelligent, good players that are
familiar with their decks. If Keeper is unplayable, to what do you
attribute my high level of success with it to, as I will often lose
one game out of three, but will rarely lose the match? Am I just
incredibly lucky? Try not to cast aspersions on the abilty of my play
group if you can in this analysis if you can help it at all. :) Also
note that I do not "drop" cards in my lap. for a complete listing if you are
interested. And yes, I would go to four FoW maindeck if I went to a
hardcore Classic tournament tomorrow, so bear with me there. :)

I don't know what to say other than it is tried and true and so far
has only been completely hosed by Tolarian Blue (don't even get me
started on that abomination!).

By Azhrei on Sunday, May 28, 2000 - 06:35 am:
Castigates? I thought I was being rather polite....

Choice #6: Matt Smith and Matt Smith


Put away that bag of apologies, Ferrett; if the reader didn’t understand the article then it was by no fault of your own.
After the posting of the article I received between twenty and twenty-five rebuttals, some of which I haven’t responded to yet, NONE of which came from people who didn’t write something nasty about me in the bdominia threads or at Star City.
I understand that after reading the title, most people probably didn’t bother reading into the article. This preconceived ideology would lead to a misunderstanding of the article... But we NEVER do that in life, do we? (That’s sarcasm.)
I’m taking it in the backside in two ways because of the article: I knew that I was going to receive mail, but I wrote the article in this style for a reason. I thought the article I wrote was done brilliantly; it’s the rebuttal article that I hate to write.
I was hoping to do a little defending, some explaining, and give a reason why my article was written the way it was. Fortunately for us, you can read Darren Di Battista’s article from Tuesday. He shares, albeit somewhat aimed towards my head, some of the myths that non-Type One players have.

I found his writing to be informative — although it should have been written in third person. Example?

"Darren Di Battista has seen the rise of at least five new decks in the last few months, two of which Darren Di Battista has created himself."

A patriot for Type One for sure, but I think this patriotism has made Battista a bit jumpy. A reader should never assume they know more than the writer does; you’re in the writer’s hands, you’ll go where he leads you.

And the bdominions, those lovely little patriots, went exactly where they were supposed to — email.

Choice #7: Rakso/Azhrei and JP/Matt


By Matt D'Avanzo, the Sylvan Librarian (Matt) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 12:25 am:
No sweat BtW, and she's not my girlfriend technically. To spare the mill (Rakso would kill me and J.P. would get a good laugh) my long-winded, ideology and profanity laced dissertation entitled "Monogamy: Perfectly Natural or B.S. Societal Constraint?" I will just say she's a very close friend and we date.

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 12:48 pm:
Nevyn: ROTFLMAO!!! Matt's a swinger!
By Rakso, Patriarch & Rules Ayatollah (Rakso) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 12:57 pm:
Matt? Mr. creatureless himself? He swings? For how many a turn?

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 01:06 pm:
Rakso, PLEASE tell me you said that on purpose. Please.

COME TO NEUTRAL GROUND! AZHREI WILL BE THERE! He does tricks at parties! The more BDers the better.
By Matt D'Avanzo, the Sylvan Librarian (Matt) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 02:26 pm:

Put it to you this way, if you were someone labelled you as a democrat (and you were affiliated with some independant party) simply because you voted for Gore instead of Bush wouldn't you want to clarify since such labels tend to identify you with a certain philosophy.


Dear sweet mother of god. If you said that on purpose Rakso you are the man.

>>>Matt: If I do make it I'll have to meet u and your gf Don't know many other girls who play magic other then a couple I knew in college. Especially competitively.

Truth be told I LEARNED how to play magic from my crazy ex-girlfriend when Ice Ages came out. I'd be happy to meet you and your bf---who taught who how to play?

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 02:33 pm:
Matt's what we call "defensive" about his lack of possessiveness. :P

I never can tell with Rakso. He's smart as a whip, but he's oblivious to a lot of colloquialisms due to cultural separation.
By Negator on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 02:39 pm:
(IP:; not AOL but changing terminals in the library)

Smart as a whip?

Here are some more quotes from Azhrei:

Strong as a cow
Quick as table
Famous as a tree
Knowledged like a tie
Brilliant as an idiot with an unspellable name trying to play T1
By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 03:04 pm:
This guy's sharp as a bowling ball!
By JP 'Polluted' Meyer, the Archivist (Jpmeyer) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:31 pm:
Dudes, you don't know how close I was to putting up campaign posters for class president that said "Vote for JP: He swings with infinitely tight men." However, since a grand total of two people would get that (one of those being me,) it was instead changed to "Vote for JP: He is an infinitely tight miser."

I love how Rakso 1984'ed the subject of this thread.

Matt? Mr. creatureless himself? He swings? For how many a turn?


I'm assuming 5 :-)

By Matt D'Avanzo, the Sylvan Librarian (Matt) on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:40 pm:
Personally I like, "Vote for J.P., he's quick as a table."


By Jeff on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 03:10 am:

Urgh... do I really have to read all that.... its soooo much information

By Rakso, Patriarch & Rules Ayatollah (Rakso) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 03:19 am:

Hell, yeah. Each part is just ONE post taken from a week's worth of flames. You sure missed a lot, and I reckon you would've been rolling over the floor if you met Ihsan.

By TracerBullet on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 03:31 am:

Damn I wish i'd been here for the days of Ishan..........Curse Neenjafus for not telling me about this site till a couple months ago........

By Exodus, the Original, Authentic and Honest-to-Goodness Non-Imper Lord of Randoms (Exodus) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 06:25 am:

Check this out.


By Negator on Monday, February 26, 2001 - 05:02 pm:
Nuk, Legend may have signed a waiver when he posted his deck that it may be copied. But as someone you copied a deck shamelessly, you need to show some respect. You have NO right to attack Legend, because he made you.


By Legend (Legend) on Monday, February 26, 2001 - 05:08 pm:
Actually, I am 9 years old.

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 09:03 am:

Everyone knows that the only choice for REAL badasses are me, Rakso, JP, and Matt. And if you're not down with that, I got two words for you.

By Rakso, Patriarch & Rules Ayatollah (Rakso) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 09:24 am:

BackStreetBoys ServeMeWell?

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 10:18 am:

Oh, real mature! I slammed you good and it just VANISHES. Foul! Foul!

By Rakso, Patriarch & Rules Ayatollah (Rakso) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 10:25 am:

Profanity spotted... And I thought you were unbalanced by Negator and began resorting to cuss words.

By Azhrei (Azhrei) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 10:30 am:

Lol, I've used curse words before and you've never done anything about it. Even when I had a whole chunk of them in all caps to get a thread deleted intentionally.

And in this case I was using it as a noun, not as an expletive-- these IS a difference you know. I just razzed you and you removed it. :P

By JP 'Polluted' Meyer, the Archivist (Jpmeyer) on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 07:31 pm:

Rakso will remove this the second he sees it, but THIS will automatically make the team of Matt and myself win.

Taken from the Rumor Mill:


By Matt D'Avanzo, the Sylvan Librarian (Matt) on Friday, June 22, 2001 - 12:34 pm:

Imagine if a girl was giving you a great handjob then suddenly stopped and shoved a dildo in your ass--and if you can't cum from that, well too damn bad, you better learn how. Sure some people (some people--this is why, according to studies, the majority of women have not experienced orgasms or only very small ones) can get off in other ways than penis/clit stimulation, but that's like (bad puns are abound here, be forewarned) having both Morphling's Plowed and having to kill with your Stroke.

By JP 'Polluted' Meyer, the Archivist (Jpmeyer) on Friday, June 22, 2001 - 05:26 pm:

And now, another bad pun:

"I pay 1 to pump Morphling's ass."

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